Ours for Ever: 2023, the Year that Was
In the third of his eponymous journeys, the fictional psychiatrist, Hector, goes in search of time. Early on, he has a vivid dream in which he is travelling on an empty train. Whilst moving between compartments, he notices something odd:
[that] the faster he walked up the corridor, the more train slowed down … If Hector stopped walking altogether to get a better view, the train would speed up, which was a little annoying.
I’ve been thinking about time a lot lately. Encounters with death, disease and decay have given me a jolt. Our days – my days – are clearly numbered.
‘We can ask and ask but we can’t have again what once seemed ours for ever,’ the narrator of J.L. Carr’s A Month in the Country observes.
2023. We can’t have it again but we can retrace its steps – in my case with the help of the diary I kept. Here, then, are its highs and lows…
The year began with a crossing, as my wife, kids and dog joined me in Brisbane following a week-long road (and ferry) trip that began in Hobart.
Well, we made it to Brizzie, at about four p.m. yesterday, and with nothing going horribly wrong. No crashes or conflict; no breakdowns or breakups. A couple of missteps (wrong turns and what-not), but no real mishaps.
‘Sorting In’, 4:35 am, Thursday, 12 January 2023
Would I be able to adapt to our new life together in Queensland, having spent a year here alone? Before we set out, I wasn’t so sure…
I learned that I can get on with dudes, that I enjoy helping peeps, that I’m a misanthropic loser only some of the time. All very useful [insights], I’m sure, but can the ‘new’ Timm co-exist with the ‘old’ Timm, the father and ‘usband? New year, new challenge.
‘End Game’, 5:46 am, Saturday, 31 December 2022
But I needn’t have worried so much.
Me and the wife … are getting on well, and I reckon we can make a go of it. Yippee!
‘Sowing the Seed’, 6:23 am, Monday, 16 January 2023
For the first time in their lives, my son and daughter changed schools. A stressful experience? Not so much.
The kids went well yesterday. A was very calm and composed, taking himself off to [high] school by himself. E did really well too, playing with another new kid and then with older kids on the basketball court, even scoring a basket. Phew – they’re gonna be okay!
‘A Welcome Fail’, 5:00 am, Tuesday, 24 January 2023
New year, same old job for me. Surprise, surprise – I wasn’t enjoying it.
Hence the need to bite the bullet and write a bestseller using every spare minute I have. That’s my aim for the year.
‘Publish or Perish’, 4:43 am, Tuesday, 31 January 2023
And write I did, finishing the first few chapters of a steamy thriller called Under Your Skin before losing hope. Elsewhere, my hopes were realised…
E loved her band rehearsal yesterday. She said she felt like crying at first, but then her band leader made everything so easy. And playing the pieces was so much fun. What. A. Relief. How happy am I!
‘High Note’, 4:19 am, Wednesday, 8 February 2023
Work continued to irk me and some weeks we barely managed to pay the rent. Then our elderly beagle, Roy, left us, having seen us safely into our new home.
Yesterday I took him to the see the vet, and the vet was categorical: there was no hope for the old fella … I was staring into his eyes as he went still, as the light … went out.
‘Sleeping Dogs’, 3:54 pm, Saturday, 25 March 2023
But life went on and we passed another milestone.
A’s birthday! He is officially a teen, even though he’s been behaving like one for months. (In a good way.)
‘Fickle Friend’, 4:36 am, Tuesday, 4 April 2023
As for my wife’s attempt to find work – it worked!
She had her first day yesterday as a permanent employee at the Ipswich Library.
‘Hot and Sticky’, 4:44 am, Friday, 17 November 2023
Some things were music to our ears.
A was awarded a Certificate of Distinction for music at his school last night.
‘In a Fog’, 5.20 am, Saturday, 25 November 2023
As it happened, the year ended positively. Positively negative.
Two nights ago AJ took a Covid test. Positive. I did the same. Positive too! Having dodged it for years, I’ve now got this much-storied virus.
‘Positively Positive’, 5:52 am, Wednesday, 20 December 2023
In reflection, the year – for me – was long, for I kept looking, failing, learning. The more I struggled and strove, the slower time’s train moved on.
2023. For a whole year it was ours for ever.
timm in type 